With people like Mitt Romney calling for wealth taxes and California exploring a wealth tax that some of those targeted say would simply force them to leave the state, there is a seemingly growing momentum to make the super-wealthy pay more, their “fair share,” if you will. The referenced opinion article with a sarcastic title in USA Today by Rex Huppke notes that globally there are 3148 billionaires, people with 1000 times more wealth than a millionaire, and 19 centi-billionaires (with net worth above $100 billion) with 100,000 times more wealth than a millionaire. He notes that in 2025, about 340 new billionaires were added, nearly one per day. The world’s richest 500 billionaires have a net worth of about $11.9 trillion, that is, $11,900,000,000,000. If all that money were in the form of $100 bills, assuming one second per bill, it would take one person 3773 years to count it, working continuously 24 hours a day. It is simply an astounding amount of wealth.
Corporate CEOs make up the vast
majority of the so-called corporate oligarchs that make up what Bernie Sanders
calls the “billionaire class.”
Is Huppke’s sarcasm apt? He gives
some New Year’s resolutions billionaires should adopt:
“Obviously, one of the main fears billionaires live with
is being eaten by a poor person. With the uberwealthy getting richer in 2025 by
occasionally shouting “AI!” and with normal-people food prices continuing to
rise, the threat of “eat the rich” becoming a reality grew considerably. That
will continue in 2026, so all billionaires must resolve to increase the
exterior wall height around their mansions to keep out hungry poors.”
I might also add that these guys
(most are guys, somewhere around 87-89%), or at least the richest ones, own AI
companies, the same ones that are building data centers, making electricity
more expensive for all people and threatening the environment, increasing
carbon emissions, threatening local drinking water supplies, consuming large
amounts of energy and water, and generating wastewater.
Where would a billionaire be
without a superyacht or two or three? Huppke continues:
“A key New Year’s resolution is to obtain the
super-est of superyachts. The most logical choice would be a superyacht that
includes its own onboard ocean, upon which there is another superyacht. The
days of low-brown “superyacht with smaller superyacht attached to the
side" are over.”
Huppke continues to the next New
Year’s resolution: talk about AI even more:
“While most billionaires did a great job of occasionally
saying things about artificial intelligence in 2025, they need to up their game
in 2026 if the glory years are to continue. It doesn’t matter what they say, as
my mention of “AI” will increase their net worth considerably.”
Huppke concludes the list of
resolutions with one to solve the issue of immortality:
“Billionaires can say things like “AI will truly be the
cognitive creativity hub of the meta-flurp moving forward” or “Artificial
intelligence has orgasmically altered our perceptions of positive
quasi-spiritual integration.” It just has to be something that doesn’t make
sense, forcing people to Google what they said and allowing AI bots to collect
more personal data.”
“In 2026, the wealthy must resolve to find the key to
immortality, allowing them more time to enjoy the money they could never
possibly spend. This might require the blood of some healthy nonbillionaires
and perhaps a bit of experimentation conducted on private islands. But as we
learned well in 2025, the super-rich are never held accountable for anything.
So I’m sure it will all be just fine.”
“Happy New Year, billionaires! Please send cash.”
References:
I hope
billionaires get richer in 2026. They deserve it. Opinion by Rex Huppke, USA
TODAY. January 1, 2026. I
hope billionaires get richer in 2026. They deserve it. | Opinion
A $2.2
trillion jump in billionaire net worth. Douglas A. McIntyre. 24/7 Wall St.
December 31, 2025. A
$2.2 trillion jump in billionaire net worth
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